Time for the olde crafte?

Monday, March 12, 2007
Current mood: giggly

(adjusting her pointy black and slightly floppy hat, wagging a bony finger)
Me dears,
Maybe it's time to use some of those witchy powers I no doubt inherited from Mother. I stumbled upon this spell - bored internet browsing can do that to you:

Select a candle of light sky blue
And cut seven notches firm and true.
Add to this seven strips of parchment paper
Placed beside thy candle taper.
Upon them scribe, both first and last
The name of the Lover bold and fast.
Fold the strips in two lengthwise
To keep the names from prying eyes.
Strike a flame and set the candle to burn
And let one strip to ashes turn.
Speak out these words seven times in all,
To summon the forces and with love enthrall:
"Spirit of the dark love Goddess dear,
Bring (name) to my arms right here.
Let me kindle the flame of desire,
And my love always with passion inspire."
Firm thy vision of what is intended
As the candle to the first notch burns and the hour is ended.
Repeat this spell a notch each night
And one of the strips gleefully light.
With witches will and concentrated vision
Thou canst capture thy lover with precision.

This is a spell for a Passionate Affair.
Yup, I could do with a bit of that!
Now, let me see: I better not buy one of these fat candles or this might take an eternity to perform; just a normal table one in light sky blue. I wonder where to find that?
And the other thing I wonder? Should I be greedy and write "George Clooney" on the piece of parchment? What if it worked? And Gorgeous George does pop around with crates of Martini like in the advert... I'd probably be far too star struck to do anything but drink all the Martini, wide eyed and shell shocked and then die of Martini poisoning making an absolute arse of myself! Aaaaaaaaargh....!
Who to write down? There is this funny, interesting sounding guy with the most wonderful voice I occasionally talk to on the phone (he can read the telephone directory to me for all I care) but I don't know what he's like. I do know his name which helps a little with the writing down, but what if he looks like "not my type at all" whatever that is? Brown paper bag? Over my own head? mmmmmmmm, the voice on it's own IS very lovely.
(giggle dies away in the distance)

(comes running back)
Wait! Wait! Wait! What if he -passionately in spellbound love- turns out to have really annoying habits I can't cope with? Like admiringly picking bellybutton fluff, or liking Nicole Kidman, or... damn, I can think of a thousand things that would rub me up the wrong way. I can see this leading to all sorts of problems. Maybe better not , eh?

By the way, did I tell you that ExBoy found my little voodoo doll while I was away? A friend gave me this little book of voodoo as a silly support wish months ago, before I fell ill. So I read it and realized that I needed something substantial of the Slapper's, like hair or nail clippings,... Little did I know then I would find that in my own home later...hah! So I decided on a positive spell for Himbo: the ring I made for him 12 year ago, shoved over the dolly's head and a big WHITE pin stuck in its heart? (big grin)
It did warp him a bit, I'm telling you!
Although whatever made him go through my drawer where he found it, God knows... Anyway, I coolly informed him that
1. there are white pins and black pins for obvious difference (black being evil wishes, strictly reserved for the Slapper... of course) and
2. if he took this serious, he was in a far worse state than I as you can compare it with a prayers and we all know those don't come true.
He shut up after that. I quite enjoyed that in a wicked way!

There is some voodoo in there after all...


Currently listening: In the Right Place by Dr. John